Perfection

sometimes things are so perfect that i feel like i am dreaming and that i will wake up any moment and realise i still lack direction and sometimes i feel like i am living inside a bubble that might burst at any moment but then you remind me that this is all real and you are real and you are the perfect balance i was missing all this time. 

Blessed

Note to self: when blessings come, be thankful for them. Remember that everything comes from the Allah and be grateful to Him.

One of the names of Allah is Ash-Shakoor - I never thought about this name too much until recently. I remember being amazed by the meaning of it. It is similar to taking very little care of a plant, but the plant giving you a lot of fruits. You put in a tiny amount of effort and you are rewarded with plenty. The fact that Allah is Ash-Shakoor means that He rewards the little that you do with plenty. I am feeling this completely in my life right now. My life, subhanallah, could not be any more perfect at the moment. I have direction, purpose, resources and confidence. Allah has surrounded me with so much support at the moment that I must, must cherish it. There were moments when I had none of those, and hence, no happiness. Alhamdulillah, I truly feel blessed. And it gives me even more conviction that Allah is indeed Ash-Shakoor.

Ways to be grateful to Allah:
- Saying Alhamdulillah (absolutely all praises and thanks belongs to Allah)
- Talking about the blessings
- Using the blessings that you're given for good purposes

“If you are grateful, I will surely give you more and more.” (Ibrahim 14:7).

Making decisions

An effective way to know what decision you should take is to ask yourself, what would I want my daughter to do? If you don't think you can bear it if your daughter takes a particular decision, don't take it yourself. It is often easier to love others more than you love yourself. It is often easier to hurt yourself more in the long term than wishing to protect someone you love. And the people you would love the most would be your children. Everyone else seems like individuals, but a person's own child probably always would seem to be a part of her. And you'd want the absolute best for your own child, even if you do not think of it for yourself.

This realisation made me realise how much my mother loves me. And also, that my daughter will probably never love me the way I would love her. But such is life.

:)

My life kind of changed quite dramatically and quickly over the past few weeks. In fact, ironically, it began in the week that I posted "So yeah. Back to who I was before. Balance." I can no longer remember what I meant by "who I was". But then, we are always changing, and it is not necessarily a bad thing. There isn't a need to go back to a particular stage, rather, we need to move forward and be better. Sometimes, we can't control the environment that we are put in, and it may seem that we are not being better while we move. But, it is up to us to make the best of every situation.

I remember thinking that it is much easier to live when you don't have anyone to weigh you down. Which is true, if the people that you are with weigh you down. But, if the people that you are with bring out the best in you, then you probably should stick to them like glue. 

Also, I am quitting gym! My year long membership finally ends at the end of this month and I shall no longer pay a shocking amount and succumb to the vanity that this society brings (lol, no that is not the reason why I'm quitting obviously). But surprisingly, I reached the goals that I set out for gym. Although, I did eat a whole lot of brownies today... yet to realise what the full impact will be. 

I am doing Philosophy of Religion as one of my electives this semester. I don't think I can handle a whole lot of philosophy, but one subject to end my degree seems to be the perfect amount. We talked about Ansalm and Descartes - and their understanding of God's existence and views of the ontological argument. My mouth was probably gaping the entire time. I absolutely loved it and possibly had the best time I have had in this entire week (and I had quite a few other good moments this week!). 

There is always so much to do and so little time. But when you are happy, none of it matters.