Time

I wrote 827 words. I don't really know what else to write but I definitely need to make it up to 2000 today. I also need to reference and finalise the essay. We've got a lunch and a dinner invite tomorrow and a henna invite the day after. We are staying over at my parents' tomorrow night. I have so many other assignments to do. I need to clean up our living space too. I need to run some errands on Monday if possible. I need to make some phone calls and book a few appointments. I need to cut my nails and brush up on my fiqh.

So much to do, so little time.

Essays

I finished the essay that's due on the 28th of July, except for referencing. Inshaallah I will do that after the 24th. My brain was feeling overloaded with the content and I could no longer understand what I've been writing. So I started the essay that's due on the 24th of July. I have five days. Two of which are weekends, which means, absolutely zero time for uni work. I've been telling myself that a crappy-okay-ish job is better than not doing it at all. I wrote about 250 words out of 2000 words. M fell asleep and I have my chocolate ready to go, although, a cup of cappa in just the right temperature and texture and taste would have been divine right now. Oh well. 

Ease

I have to finish three assignments for my masters in the next 5 weeks. I always find these things so difficult until I finish it, and even then I'm not sure until I actually get the mark back. So the bottom line is, if Allah helps, anything becomes easy and until He helps, things will keep being difficult.

Songs for M - 1

I made this up on the way back from work on the 3rd of December, 2016. You were inside me for about five months by then.

You make my tummy flutter,
You're my little butterfly.
You make my heartbeat quicker,
With the light that flickers in your eyes.
And in my minds eye,
I can see your tiny hands;
And when you grow up
I hope you understand -
How much I loved you from this moment on,
Even before you were born.

P.S: She was 10.5 weeks in that last post. She's 11 weeks now! Already losing count. 

9.5

M is nine and a half weeks now. The crazy hormonal thoughts have almost subsided, alhamdulillah. I still do get the occasional bouts of irrational thoughts, but Mr H has been absolutely great about it. He buys me chocolate and let me keep all the money that M got on Eid. My caffeine finances for 2017 sorted!

M shows her recognition quite well these days - she flashes the biggest smile her tiny face can hold and throws her arms and legs around. This morning, while she lay on the bed and I sat at the computer trying to get started on an essay, she stared at me with super sad eyes. Every time I made eye contact, she smiled so bright that I almost gave up on my work. She coos and aahs with anybody that would spare the time for her. My mum is amazing at talking to M - she responds to her so, so well! She spent the last four days with her cousins in a different state, Z, now 5, and K, nearly 2. Z and K loved to talk to her as well, and M loved the attention.

I need to start filling out M's baby book regularly and properly. There are some things that are not relevant, I am thinking I can stick photos on top of those. I need to start compiling her photos and print them out. I ordered some books from book depository for M. I am thinking I will also make an anthology of poetry for her. Words that I love, bound for her, to read whenever she wants, if she wants.