Tuesday, December 24, 2013

Let's unwrite these pages and replace them with our own words

The world is going more and more haywire. In Bangladesh, joint police forces are silently shooting members of a political party at night and managing to keep a great percentage of the nation unaware by blocking anti-government materials from going into national news. This is on top of some of the bizarre things that happened in the past, like the massacre from 5th November 2012, or hanging a person without trial and getting most of the nation to rejoice at the torture, setting up secret torture cells in university student accommodations and torturing youth from that particular political party. Israel has increased flooding in Gaza by opening a dam, on top of bombing the strip frequently, and is now denying any 'allegations' of the existence of the dam existing. Rape is one of the most prominent horrors in the Syrian war. I still have images of Rohingyans fleeing from burning homes stuck in my mind, but the existence of the oppression is unknown to most of the world.

I think the biggest challenge for us now is that truth and untruth are almost inseparable. Some people so fiercely believe in a lie, even though it goes against all logic and history that I feel like I need to be able to be so well versed in both of those areas that I can dispel them head on if they come my way. But my memory is so bad that I find myself fumbling when confronted with a misconception, which gives a very wrong idea to the other person. But I guess this is one of those things that I need to try to target and fix. Sitting and brooding about injustices do nothing except make one feel more and more helpless, leading to learned helplessness. There are lots of things that we would not be able to fix by ourselves, but there are lots of ways that we can contribute in the fixing up. I heard this story in some lecture ones - a man was walking along the shore and throwing washed up starfish back into the ocean, one starfish at a time. Someone asked him why he is doing so, and whether he is really making any difference at all, he replied with something like, 'I am making a difference to every starfish I save.' Although I don't entirely agree with the concept (i.e.: I don't think it's enough that we save individual lives. We need to be involved in collective efforts in bringing long term, large scale changes.), I agree with the sentiments of it. All we can do is our part.

I talked to Miffy today - she is so inspiring! She is one of those people who believe in constant improvement and actually goes for it. She pulled me out of the misery bubble I built around myself for the past few days (the bubble of learned helplessness). She told me some very important things:
- To take some solid goals for next year in terms of what I want to achieve. I have, of course, done this in the previous years, but I've always restricted myself to personal goals. Miffy reminded me to take goals about the projects I take on as well.
- Your duas reflect what things are important to you. If you are not praying for it, you are not giving it enough importance. (My sis told me this the other day too. She told me to "turn my worries into duas".)
- Whenever something gets tedious, renew your intention.

I am feeling super relaxed right now. I finally lit the candle that Emu gave me ages ago - not sure why I was saving it. It is forcasted to rain tomorrow, after the burning heat from the past two days. My windows are open, so I can feel the light, rainy breeze. And I'm listening to Lauren King's acapellas. I should do this more often. I realised, I am okay with having lots of people near me as long as I get some alone time to clear my mind. Otherwise people get to my nerves.

So yeah. Back to who I was before. Balance.


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