Sunday, September 08, 2013


The power of words frequently amazes me - the way they can slice you to pieces and also sew up a wound. One of my friends once described communication as something that changes you, because it causes a change in the chemicals in your brain, so, after talking with someone, you become a slightly different person to who you were before the conversation. To be able to effectively communicate is half the battle in anything. If you can articulate your problems in words, then you will know what the problem exactly is, and then you can solve it. It amazes me because we use it so much, so many words, but most of us don't stop to think about the effect of the words we are using.

I recently heard an argument where one person accused another person of saying something, possibly years ago. The boy remembered what the girl said, because it really hurt him, but the girl forgot it entirely and denied it. In another interaction I was present in, one of the people said some things to the other person that didn't seem to be too much of a big deal to the person who said it, but to me, seemed to be poisonous and numbing. If someone said those words to me, I would probably feel crippled, become clinically depressed and then turn into a psychopath. This made me think about some of the bridges I burnt in the past with my words. I deliberately burnt some of them, and others were just burnt due to my stupidity. And, when I was reminded of some of the things I said during some of those times, it made me cringe. And I realised that no matter what I do, I can't take the words back. It doesn't matter if I'm nice to that person for the next ten years - it won't take away the poison from the words I've already used.

Sometimes I forget that kindness isn't just something that used to exist in the past. No matter what happens, we should still hold onto that side of us that make people smile and love.

The prophet said: “Nothing will be heavier on the Day of Resurrection in the Scale of the believer than good manners. Allah hates one who utters foul or coarse language.” (Tirmidhi)

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