E boyoshe pran tibro ar prokhor!

I have officially stepped into adulthood. I don't exactly feel anything, I certainly don't feel any more mature. My school friends threw me a food party two days ago, in which the five of us ate our grief away. We were all bored and depressed after the economics results came out, so the party was not too much of a success. (But the chocolate mudcake and pods were worth it!) Then an unexpected card from Justine, covered in pictures of chocolates as well! I think up until I came home, that was my best gift, because it came as a surprise. I figured I absolutely love surprises. If you tell me you will buy me a car, I don't think I would be as happy as if you stick an unexpected post-it note on my maths book.

So I came home, depressed, looking forward to my sleep. But my holiday mode kicked in and I decided to sprawl on the sofa and watch TV. I also made lasagna today, dubbed 'kick-ass lasagna' by the person who created the recipe. It really was a kick-ass lasagna, everyone loved it! I love the genuine look of enjoyment in faces. By the end of dinner, only two pieces were left (by force - ma wanted to save them for the next day.) I think I had a stupid smile hovering on my face the whole time.

My next unexpected gift was the gift from my family - a phone. I didn't expect it to be something so huge, so I was over the moon at the idea. Apuni reminded me again how loved and spoilt I am by everyone in my family. I know I am, but I often forget. I feel ashamed to think that I chose to scream at my mother instead of arguing with a stranger. I know I have hurt them, probably more than ever in the last few days. I know I don't have any excuse to do so, because they are the closest people to me.

I don't want to be scared, I don't want to cry and feel sorry for myself. I hope this next year will be as colourful as Shukanto described it to be. I hope I will grow up, shrink at the waistline, fit more beauties in my heart, become organised and responsible, and get closer to Him, a little more. Please pray so that I can live up to my age.