Beaut(y) + (ie)s

Its been nearly a month since I last wrote in here! However, I haven't stopped writing altogether (as you can tell...). In case you, my precious reader, did not realise/know, I started a second blog. While I vent and state my personal evolution in this one, I shall fill up the other blog with advices from my life. Things I learnt that have made me a better person - things I learnt from others and myself. Honestly, knowledge is lost if it is not practised or passed on. Basic psychology since the 1960s says something like this: You see/hear/touch/smell/taste something -> goes into your very temporary memory -> This information is lost OR it goes into your short term memory -> This information is lost OR it goes into your long term memory through rehearsal -> This information is lost OR is retrieved into your short term memory.

Our Prophet (pbuh) said: "Acquire knowledge and impart it to the people." (ref: Al-Tirmidhi, Hadith 107)


I found that to be quite interesting. Islam places a great importance of 'collective' worship, unlike other religions. Part of that is collectively learning and teaching - the wisdom behind this (according to me) is that worshiping is designed for every person. So, the society as a whole needs to gain knowledge and practise it, rather than a few people sitting in a cave far away from humanity. And that makes it harder to lose knowledge, hence, it makes it easier for future generations to uphold it too. Does that make sense? It all makes sense in my head, however, I am not quite sure that I am successfully imparting thoughts. As usual! Forgive me if I have just broken some wires in your brain and made you as confused as me without coffee. 


While we are on the topic of psychology, can I just mention how thankful I am for being able to make the decision of changing degrees? I don't think I mentioned it over here, but now I am doing Psychological Science. I am majoring in Psychology and Neuroscience/Linguistics (not quite sure about which one to choose). Psychology is absolutely awesome. We finished our introduction to developmental psychology, and now, we just began to study psychology of attachment to loved ones. I shall elaborate more later when I have time (just realised I have about 10 minutes to finish this). 


Linguistics is quite fascinating, it is making me more inclined towards learning another language. I think it is also making me open minded to people who have language difficulties. It is also making me consider ESL teaching. Ah - the possibilities of the future! Teaching itself has become more appealing to me in the past few months. I love my current students. I love their innocence, I love their acceptance, I love their ability to learn. Adults need to learn to acquire these abilities from children. I was recently rejected from a tutoring centre because of my Hijab. Again - please refer to future posts for details. :)


As part of my psychology course, I need to be a subject of psychology experiments for researchers. In the past two days, I have seen three dead people on screen. One was a real dead person, as a result of a real car crash. They showed her distorted face, very clearly, on the screen. There were also three (or was it four?) other severly injured people under the completely up side down car. The other two were from films, but they were shown one after another. Anyway, I've been having nightmares for two days in a row. I hope it goes soon. 

Here's a song that I found very relevant. Wrote this on the 18th of June, last year.


The world is so beautiful when clouds drizzle on my hair
The world is so beautiful when the sky is blue and clear
When the sun shines through the rain
The colours drive me insane
And the birds fly so high in the sky
And I wonder why
I didn't want to be alive.


The world is so beautiful when I dive in the ocean
And play with blue whales in my imagination
Walk through desert lands
Feel my toes hide in sand
And the birds fly so high in the sky
And I wonder why
I didn't want to be alive.


A hungry child ravages the bin and picks up a handful of rice
His home is run down by cockroaches and mice
Yet he looks up at the sky and believes that its nice
For this beautiful heart, the beauty will suffice.


A young girl walks down a destroyed street
Its been years and years since she last tasted meat
All she sees nowadays is torn human beings
Yet, when she looks at the sky, her heart can still sing.


Ya Rahmanur Rahim
I know that You are near
When I see beauty through my misery and tears
When the sun shines through my mind
Even though bleakness blinds me
I know the birds fly so high in the sky
And I wonder why
I didn't want to be alive.