Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Impatiently waiting.

One of my worst traits is impatience. I just cannot wait for answers when I start looking for them. I can't wait for food when I'm hungry. I get all cranky when I'm told to do something when I'm sleepy. And when I want someone to see something, I want them to see it here and now. This possibly repels them from wanting to see my point of view, because, every force has an equal and opposite force. The softer you are, the softer the resistance is. The harder and more impatient you are, the lesser you should expect a positive attitude. I understand this, but I forget to implement it when it comes to people I care about. I guess this results from following my heart instead of my head - its so much easier to advance logically and rationally when you know that it doesn't matter if the person you are talking to understands you or not.

I know that at the end of the day, what someone else thinks is not in my hands. But I still keep insisting on having a hand in it, when that person is someone close. Maybe, its because I'm scared they'll influence my thoughts in the wrong way? Maybe I'm scared that my knack of being swayed easily will slowly take me away from where I really want to go. I guess I'm just not strong enough to hold up by myself when someone close is falling apart, especially when there are so many other complicated factors involved. 

Whoever fears God, He will find a way out for him and He will provide for him in a way he had never reckoned on. He who puts his trust in God, God will suffice for him. God is sure to bring about whatever He decrees. (65:2-3)