Friday, June 17, 2011

17th june

I am pretty sure there is a hole/an undiscovered pocket in my bag. In times of dire need, I forget that I failed to discover the opening in the past, and I take out everything in my bag to extract that pen that I keep feeling. And every single time, I have to put everything back in frustration and reaffirm that the hole/pocket has somehow become undone. It reminds of Finders Keepers by Emily Rodda - like it has somehow crossed a barrier that took it beyond my physical reality. What I need to do, is take out everything again, and look for the hole in broad sunlight, with a magnifying glass. And if I still can't find it, I shall just cut a hole and rescue the pen.

I have decided to quit working for the annoying employer that I keep referring to. Even though I love the kids, the woman is just too infuriating to work with. My uni timetable is also quite full next sem, so it would be good if I free up some hours. And everyone in my family synonymously agreed that I should quit. Therefore, next week, I shall tell her the bad (good) news, which will give her about a month to find someone new before the new school term starts. I have realised that stuffing my life with commitments is not the correct approach in developing myself. I really should learn to say 'no' when I cannot take up a responsibility, and if I do, I really need to learn to carry through. My goal was to never have too much time on my hands, which I have successfully reached, however, now I seem to have rolled over to the other side where I do not even have time to process any information/experience/feelings at all. The underlying reason for that goal was the fact that an idle mind is the devil's workshop, yet, my mind still seems to be his workshop even though I hardly have time for anything useful.

Therefore, I need to step back and re-evaluate. Once I have done so, I shall post in my currently dead blog - Secret of Worship.

I finished my exams today! The plan is to completely detox myself of junk food, unhealthy behaviours and lack of direction. However, I also woke up with a cold today, which means that most of my holiday will be spent finishing tissue boxes, in bed and complaining about how I should start the detox process but how I am unable to. However, most of it will probably be done over blog posts, so you can skip as much as you want to. :)

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